My wife and I are in an argument over what the definition of alcohol abuse is versus misuse. From what I learned in my high school health class misuse IS abuse if the person drinking is underage as in our son's case. My wife believes that abuse is reserved for raging alcoholics and that our son is just experimenting like everyone else his age. I have mixed views given my own "experimentation", but I want to handle this better than our parents did. Our son also recently received a public intoxication ticket and we had to pick him up from the police station.
In the grand scheme of things the answer does not help us with our underage son, but it at least puts us on the same page as how best to handle it.
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The difference in alcohol misuse and alcohol abuse depends on a number of factors. If one drinks too much the night before and wakes up with a hang-over that can be construed as alcohol misuse. If this occurs often and you are missing work then one may deem it as abuse.
The fact that your son is underage makes it alcohol abuse. The laws have been setup to prevent this type of behavior and you have a situation where an individual violating two factors. They are breaking the law and at the same time are drinking to a point where it is apparent to law enforcement.
I would advise you seek out help. There are many resources out there that can help you in this situation. The web is full of treatment centers. One that I have recommended to others is http://www.stonershoppe.com Funny name, good list of resources.
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